Bad taste is no accident

You know when you turn on the TV in the middle of the day or late at night and you see those horrible cheesy lawyer TV commercials asking you to think twice about bankruptcy, car accidents or harassing creditors? And they have the look and production quality of about $2? What if someone did a spoof on these commercials?

Well someone did.

If you haven't checked it out yet, you need to click yourself over to www.warwick-seltz.com. It's a spoof on the whole bad/cheesy lawyer TV commercial genre, only the topic here is, "pizza." Royce Warwick (main character) of Warwick-Seltz represents the rights of mediocre pizza victims. It's actually quite funny! You can view the TV commercials, or even do a Live Consultation with Royce Warwick by clicking one of the phrases/questions or type one in yourself. (Incidently, if you type in "The Dosdall Party" in the Live Consultation section, you'll see me). Check it out!

Vahn-Zan

Well here's a few pics of my friend's new puppy (Boxer named Vahn-Zan). Just about the cutest puppy ever. Seriously, we were just sitting in the front yard and people would stop what they were doing to come over and pet the little guy. It's amazing what people will do when there is a puppy around. And I don't think this little guy has any clue the amount of power he can command.

Well, enjoy the pics and here's hoping your head doesn't implode from high levels of cuteness.

Vauhn-Zan in cell phone 'attack mode'

Wood Ticks Everywhere!!

This last weekend marked the first official paintball-camping weekend at Andyland (my friend Andy’s land about 40 mins east of Brainerd, MN). A bunch of friends and myself go twice a year up to camp and play paintball. It was good to escape to the great outdoors and really enjoy the lo-tec land of no cell phone reception. I think in total I got about 4 hours of sleep. Very restful! If you haven’t got out camping lately with some good friends, a campfire and a few beers, well trust me you need to!

However, the main draw of the weekend was of course PAINTBALL. If you haven’t ever experienced paintball, it’s actually a lot of fun. Yes, the paintballs do hurt when you get hit (I realize no guy will actually admit that fact), but you are usually so hopped up on adrenaline that you don’t notice it. It’s about the closest to combat you’ll come without using real bullets. However, how we play it usually amounts to a bunch of stupid guys shooting at each other in the woods. So not the most professional or controlled of paintball games. But it’s always fun and every game always ends in the most intelligent adrenaline-induced conversations recounting what happened, “Dude, I was going to run, but then I didn’t and then I shot you and then I ran!!” Ahhh…yeah…cool, man.

Well if you ever feel like joining us morons just go here for details and may God help you! We are going again in October.

Here’s a few pics for your viewing pleasure:

Got Wood?

FIRE!!!

Hamock Represent!!

Stargazer

Ahh crap!!!

Meal in a Bag - Before

Meal in a Bag - After (Yum!)

Taco Johns ... Conquered!!

Ninjas are cool

Well there's just no getting around it. Ninjas are bad-ass! Simply put. Chances are there is probably a ninja behind you right now (as you are reading this) waiting to snap your neck, but you'd never know it cause they are so steathly cool you can never find them.

Well I maybe behind the times on this one, but click below for a hilarious lesson in Ninja stealth skills!

AskaNinja.com (Click here and check out the video section)

For your viewing pleasure, I've posted a link (from YouTube.com) just to give you a taste of what "ninja video greatness" awaits you.

Can Ninjas Catch Colds?

Babies make us stupid

This weekend I was reminded of another sad "human truth" that us as homosapiens are powerless to resist. Believe me, if you think about it there are many sad "human truths" that span all across the globe no matter who you are or where you come from. As long as you are human, you will do it!! For example, why is it that when you pass a billboard on the side of the road with a car full of people someone will read the billboard out loud? I mean everyone in the car can read and is looking right at the billboard, right?!? Yet this one person feels compelled to read it out loud for everyone to hear just in case there is a dyslexic person in the car. Or why is it that when you see one person looking up in the sky (at nothing in particular) you will get other people to stop and look up (at nothing in particular) for long periods of time. Ever experience a traffic jam?

Well the one sad "human truth" in particular I was reminded of this weekend was how babies make people stupid. Don't get me wrong. I like babies; they are cute and all, and I even hope to have one of my own some day. That and well we sort of need them to survive as a species. But this weekend I was with my family at church. Before church started I was talking with several people I hadn't seen in a long time. We were having an intelligent conversation, and then someone brought over a newborn baby for us to meet and look at. I watched the group simultaneously go from intelligent to Cro-Magnon in about .02 seconds. It was scary! Everyone changed their posture (slumping over), raised their eyebrows, mouth agape, and then dropping about 100 IQ points proceeded to speak in an inaudible language not even known to babies. Seriously, even the baby was looking at these people like they were retarded. It was just funny (and really sad at the same time)!! I think I even heard the word, "Shmoopie" a couple of times. Yes, the baby was really cute, don't get me wrong, but standing a little back from the group I watched as this sad experiment in human nature unfolded and I just realized that...babies make us stupid. It's just one of those things. I couldn't help but roll my eyes and go find my seat.

Next time you are faced with one of these situations don't let human nature take over! Resist and watch as the rest of the group falls victim to dumb human instinct. If nothing else, it's usually entertaining to watch.

My future car

Well Aston Martin announced the true star of the upcoming new James Bond film Casino Royale today and it's not British actor Daniel Craig. No far from it, the new James Bond car was unveiled ... the new Aston Martin DBS. Once I saw this metalic beauty I immediately knew this was going to be my next car.

Then I realized I wasn't a super-secret agent or a billionaire who owned his own exotic private island...yet. Regardless, it's still a really sweet looking car. Click here for more pics.

Honestly, I'm not sure what it would take to be a super-secret agent in Her Majesty's Service, but I'm sure owning this car would help. Or at least turn a few heads. I mean can you imagine seeing this car at the local Applebee's?? Yeah, I don't think so. I'm pretty sure that if you even got close to the Applebee's parking lot, with this car, the Universe would somehow implode on itself. However, as it stands I'm not a secret agent yet (sorry ladies) so for the meantime I guess I'll just settle for watching this beauty on the big screen.

I'll see you at Applebee's ... after the movie.

Hot Tent Action

Well with the peer pressure of a couple of my friends, whom I was about ready to kill, I finally purchased a tent.

To set this story up for you, I’m going up north to my friend’s land (Andyland) camping and playing Paintball (click here for details) next weekend. We do it with a bunch of people twice a year. Once in May and again in October, so it’s not too hot or too cold. What it amounts to is a bunch of dumb guys in the woods trying to shoot each other and some of the most intelligent conversations ever take place after every game. The conversations usually go something like this after the game, “Did you see me? I was running and then I wasn’t going to shoot you, but I did and then I ran. It was awesome!!” Only the stories involve a lot of speed talking (due to the adrenaline) and lots of hand motions. And that is one of the more intelligent conversations. Honestly!!

So anyways, for the longest time I just couldn’t justify buying a tent for 2 weekends out of the year, when I could just borrow someone else’s for a couple of nights. Well my friends Mikey B and Pete apparently saddened by their decision long ago to buy a tent and their general fear of being unique, have been giving me shit for going on two years to buy a tent. Well, I’m living proof that peer pressure works, my friends. Sad but true.

So last night I ended up buying a 4 person tent at Fleet Farm. It may not be super-duper high quality, but for my needs it's a nice tent and should get the job done.

Here's a pic:



So Mike and Pete, this is my official notice that you both can STFU on the whole “tent” subject.

P.S. – Today is Mikey B’s B-Day. Take a visit over to his blog and wish him a Happy B-Day. He turns the 90 today the old timer … okay not really.

Secret Agent Man

Explosions. Kidnappings. Attractive Women. According to the standard model of action movies, Mission: Impossible III has everything necessary to keep us guys entertained (and women too).

In M:I 3 we join Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) once again for more super-secret shenanigans that seem ‘impossible’ to accomplish (hey, it’s in the title what do you expect). However, we add another element to the ‘spy’ equation … his wife (Michelle Monaghan). Ethan Hunt struggles in this movie to keep his spy life and home life separate, but as all spy/action movies have taught us … you just can’t do that. So, enter into the equation one super rich and all powerful weapons dealer and villain extraordinaire Owen Davian (Philip Seymour Hoffman). Throw in a little wife kidnapping. Plus, a chemical bomb that could kill us all. Then, top it all off with some torture and lots of beautiful women. And you’ve got yourself the makings of Mission: Impossible III.

To be honest, I had a great time watching this movie. From the moment the movie starts you are already involved in the action and suspense. Although, the crowning jewel in the movie is not the action nor Tom Cruise, but the performance by Philip Seymour Hoffman. He truly delivers a very believable evil performance that will have you shouting during the movie, “Heeeeyyyy….that guy’s evil!!” I did, and well I got shushed, but hey he was really evil! If anything, I wish that Hoffman’s character could have recieved more screen time to be developed. But alas there impossible missions to be had and beautiful women to save.

So, if you looking for a good action movie that offers suspense and some good all-around dumb fun, then Mission: Impossible III is yours to accept.

I give this movie 3 out of 4 stars.

Incidentally, this review will NOT self-destruct in 5 seconds.

Happy Cinco de Mayo!!

What better way to celebrate Cinco de Mayo, this wonderful Mexican holiday celebration, than trying to escape Mexico for the USA?

Below are some pics of one drunk Mexican dressing up as a "car seat" trying to sneak into America past the border patrol.

I hope you enjoy these as much as I did. (Nice try, Paco.)

Happy Cinco de Mayo!!

Today's Random Pic...

Garden Gnomes
Creepy aren't they? You never know where they'll strike next!!