TOTAL PET TAKEOVER!!

I was at work today roaming the office halls watching people interact with one another's dogs. You see at my place of employment (an ad agency) people are allowed to bring their dogs with them to work. It promotes a more friendly and creative enviornment, or so the story goes.

Well anyways, as I was walking around the office I couldn't help but laugh and once again realize the power that animals have over the human species.

All morning I was listening to people (mostly women, and a few guys) seeing other people's dogs in the office and once they did, I noticed, an unavoidable force overtook them, crippled their bodies and they regressed in age to that of a 2 year old, going cross-eyed and making googly-baby noises. When this happened the dog usually started wagging it's tail, ears perked up (feeling attention starved) and then it went in for all the petting and attention that an animal can get, like a junkie with the promise of his next fix.

However, I pose something else is actually going on here. All over the world I purpose that dogs (and cats alike) are just playing possum having us think they are the lesser intelligent species, when one day as we all regress in intellect and spouting baby-speak they will finally make their move, strike with vengence and over take THE HUMANS!!

So next time you see a middle-aged woman hunched over a dog, go cross-eyed and start saying, "You're just the cutest little thing! Yes you are! Yes you are!" in her highest-pitched baby voice. Be prepared for an all-out imminent "ninja-style" attack by the furry little creatures we call 'pets'.

Just my observation.

I'm Big in Japan

Well I finally made it back from Tokyo, Japan. Overall, a fantastic trip and some truly AMAZING experiences were had. If you ever get the chance to go, I highly recommend it!

I also managed to take about a billion (and two) pics for all to enjoy. Click here to view them.

Well as proof of a trip well done I leave you with this evidence that I'm BIG in Japan.

Cheers!

Charlie the Unicorn

Crazy adventures ensue at Candy Mountain, and it just goes to show...

NEVER TRUST A UNICORN!!

Happy Festivus!!

Well it's that time of the year once again. Time to get the pole out of the crawlspace and begin the alternate holiday tradition ... Happy Festivus Everyone!!

Let us all partake in the: (1) Airing of Grievances, and (2) The Feats of Strength.

Happy Festivus.

Look it`s Godzilla!!

Well I`ve finally arrived! Tokyo, Japan. That was one long-ass flight (12 hrs.)! I figured it out. I was up for 25 hours straight when I was finally able to go to bed for the first time in Japan.

Well I`m here, no one looks like me, and no one speaks my language.

Gotta love Japanese Yen though. It doesn`t look and feel like real money, more like Monopoly money. So, let the fun begin and spend spend spend!!

(I just got Park Place. Sweet!!)

P.S. - Happy Lucky Big Time ... You Buy LOTS!!!

Leavin' on a Jetplane

Well it's finally here. A trip 3 years in the making is at hand.

Tomorrow at 1pm my flight departs for Tokyo, Japan!! Two weeks of little people, strange languages, and foriegn food. I can't wait to be the tallest guy in the country as people take pictures of me and yell "GODZILLA!!"

Sayonara Everyone! Maybe I'll even be able to do an update or two from the road.

My First Wild Hockey Game

No, I’m not 3 years old. Well, mentally maybe. But today I witnessed my first Minnesota Wild hockey game. And as far as first experiences could go, not too bad.

I got a call from the Rick James and he told me he had an extra ticket and today was the day to behold my first Wild hockey game in the Xcel Arena. Now I’ve been to the Xcel Arena before for concerts (Foo Fighters/Weezer – which was amazing!), but never hockey. So I ran down to James (well actually I drove), we hopped in the H-Bomb and we were on our way.

First, I was hungry and needed sustenance before the game. Hey, any real player needs his energy right? What other better place to stop for food than McDonalds? Well, in the words of Ron Burgundy, “McDonalds was a bad choice!” Half-way through the game I experienced what I can only describe as side-splitting cramps as my body started to reject the foul cuisine that I had mistakenly put into it. But as any good hockey player would do; I shook it off and played with the pain.

So long story short, we got free parking, got to the arena and took our seats. The thing that’s great about the Xcel Arena is that every seat is a great seat. Especially the 200 level (upper deck – cheap seats), which is exactly where we sat. Great seats from up there you could see everything!! We were ready for the game!

The challenge: MN Wild vs. Phoenix Coyotes. Okay, not too hard of a challenge. As the Phoenix Coyotes are not doing too well this year, even under the tutelage of hockey great Wayne Gretzky. However, all in all a pretty entertaining hockey game. Lots of good plays, near misses, and good team work. The final score was 4-0 and the Wild were victorious against Wayne Gretzky’s lame Coyotes. Sorry Gretzky! You may have been the former god of hockey, but we can’t live on memories alone. Just ask the band Poison.

Once the game was over, that’s when the real action took place. The moment Rick James had been preparing and anticipating for for who knows how long. I watched as the last few seconds ticked by on the scoreboard clock and then listened as the final horn blared defiantly, signifying the end of the game. I stood up thinking we were going to leave and all I notice is an arm on my shoulder and a quick few words from the James, "Oh no, man. Sit down. We’re not leaving yet. The best part is coming!” Confused I sit down and wait patiently. I watch and look down at the arena where everyone starts to file out of their rows as they look like ants leaving the colony. Soon the arena gets emptier and emptier. Finally, after a few minutes only a few people are left and James stands up and says, "Here we go!" Immediately the Rick James springs into action running up this row and that. Bending down with lighting quick speed and reflexes he continues to pick stuff up from the floor while running like a monkey on a mission. What is he picking up? Why is he running up the rows and aisles? I quickly figure it out what he is doing. What some consider trash … to the James is gold. He’s going around and picking up all the used plastic souvenir cups he can find for the use of his beloved daily 'Chocolate Milk routine' at home, or perhaps for the use of cups to serve beer at his next party.

After a few minutes James returns and says,” Okay dude, now we can go.” I look up to a towering monument of MN Wild cups. Even Wally the Beerman would be proud! There were 39 in all, just one cup shy of 40. We head out of the arena and everyone we pass just stares at the wobbling stack of plastic cups and a few people ask if Eric’s okay to drive home or if he’s had too much to drink to which he responds in a fake drunken accent, “Iiimmm alllrriigghttt!”

We get back to the car, the cups hit the backseat and we’re on the road. I’ve experienced my first Wild game and Eric has his crowning achievement. All in all, a good adventure.

However, just a word of wisdom to the readers out there. Next time you find yourself down at the Rick James’ House of Funk and he offers you a cup to put your beverage of choice in. Take a close gander at the emblem on the cup and an even closer look inside. Consider it just a few words of wisdom from a fellow onlooker.

Guitar Hero II. Greatest Game EVER???

Well I'm behind the times a bit on this one, but through some co-workers I recently discovered the video game magic and addiction known as Guitar Hero II. For those that aren't familiar (like I was). This is one of those video games you usually encounter people playing in the aisles of Best Buy, while parents and friends are yelling at the player in phrases like, "Billy, we have to go NOW!!" or "Okay, fine I'm leaving then. See watch here I go, I'm walking out the door!! This is me walking out the door now." or my favorite "Hey dumbshit, we gotta go the movie starts in like 5 mins!!!"

Well rarely does a video game come along that no matter your level of skill, interest or coolness in relation to the "video game" category that a game can captivate and get you addicted so much that you tend to lose all track of time, forget loved ones, or just have a general disregard for all other obligations in life. Well Guitar Hero is one of those games!!

Last week with the release of Guitar Hero II some co-workers were playing it and competing here at work. I was trying to get them to do something (job related), but instead I was being ignored as everyone was addicted and playing Guitar Hero II. Well, hey if you can't beat 'em join them, right? (Or key their cars ... but that's a different story.) So I picked up the guitar, started the game and *BAM* I was hit with a shockwave of instant hypnotic addiction. Maybe it was the music, maybe the seizure inducing blinking lights or maybe my aching wrist and cramped fingers ... I can't be sure. But I was hooked!! That night I immediately went and bought my own version from Best Buy. A week later, I can say I'm still hooked and it was a sound purchase.

So for those not yet addicted to Guitar Hero II, well ... enjoy your freedom while it lasts. For all other curious potential rockers click here.

BTW - This game includes over 55 songs to rock out to including "Trogdor" by Strong Bad. It doesn't get any cooler then that!! Burninating the Countryside!!

Go Vote!

Well today is election day and this is your reminder to get out and vote!

Personally, I probably won't (because I don't give a rip about any of the candidates), but you should because unlike me you are a good person, right!?!

Don't know where to vote? Fear not, my fellow voter!

Click here to find where to go to the polls.

Red Bull ‘Art of the Can’ Exhibit – A Tale of Fake People

So last night I found myself at the Weisman Art Museum for the private showing of the Red Bull ‘Art of the Can’ Contest – Sculpture Exhibit. First off, I was there because my ad agency, sponsored by Red Bull, had a number of people who did a couple of sculptures that made it into the show.

Going into the event I wasn't sure what to expect other than the event should be pretty laid back with a bunch of free Red Bull around and some cool young “extreme sport” type of people. Right? Umm….yeah. I was wrong.

First off, my group and I stroll in (sporting our fancy t-shirts and jeans) around 9:30pm; 2.5 hours after the exhibit has started. The place is PACKED!! And the men are in fancy suits with black ties and the women in even fancier revealing dresses.

Secondly, from my keen observation skills I quickly realized you either fell into one of three categories.

• Category 1 - You were an artist with weird misunderstood (for a reason) clothing and hair that looked like you just woke up.

• Category 2 - You were a boorish pretentious bastard artist-wannabe that wouldn’t talk to anyone because you thought you were above it all. ....OR
  

• Category 3 – You were severely underdressed (and uninformed) because what you thought was going to be a laid back fun event (like it said on the invitation) really wasn’t accurate at all.

All in all, despite our expectations being WAY OFF. It was a good time. We all enjoyed: free Vodka Red Bull drinks all night long, jaw droppingly hot women to look at (always nice), some pretty cool looking sculptures made out of Red Bull cans and some interesting artists to talk to.

What was really funny about the night though is how everyone there took the exhibit and everything so seriously. Come on people, this the Red Bull ‘Art of the Can’ Contest at the Weisman in Minnesota. We're not socialist fashionistas looking for the next potential Picasso in New York City. So adjust your expectations (and attitudes) accordingly.

If you want to check out the Red Bull ‘Art of the Can’ Exhibit. It opens to the public this Saturday, Nov. 4th -12th at the Weisman Art Museum in Minneapolis. Click here for details. And keep drinking that Red Bull.

Halloween ... Brick Tamland Style

Brick Tamland here. Weatherman and heart of the Ch. 4 News team in San Diego.

Well me, my lamp and the rest of the Ch. 4 News team (Ron Burgundy, Champ Kind, and Veronica Corningstone) assembled for some Halloween hijinks and shinanigans this weekend. And I have to say that it was an instant success! We went live and on location. Good show everyone! Kudos to Eric (aka - 'Turbo' from American Gladitors) on the par-tay.

Also, want to give another 'shout out' (as the kids say) to my good friend Cory on his Friday Night-tastic Halloween party. Brick found himself attending that party solo from the Ch.4 Newsteam (as Brick sometimes has to do when he wanders away from the news desk). But, it was a kickin' party nonetheless! I can't remember the last time I've stayed up till 6AM in the morning like that. Not to mention that much of a hard liquor selection. Pretty crazy!

Well to all that shared in the Brick Tamland Halloween fun this weekend. I say thank you! Maybe next time you can all come to the "pants party" instead.

To view the pics from the Halloween 2006 adventure click here or here.

Ch. 4 News Team

(Champ Kind, Veronica Corningstone, Ron Burgundy, and Brick Tamland)

Gettin' jiggy with it

Mel (Mystic Mummy) and Corey (Champ Kind)

(Another pic - just for Mel)

Eric (Turbo the American Gladiator) and Liz (Mary Catherine Gallagher)

Pete (Paul Bunyan) and Anne (Babe the Blue Ox)

Me ... if I was in the Beastie Boys 'Sabotage' Music Video

AND .....

Vahn (as Kujo the Vampire Dog)

Take the Bus

This morning I easily had the worst commute of my life on my drive into work, and in hopes that typing it out and venting will calm me down, I’m sharing it with all of you. Enjoy!

The goal: A drive from Linden Hills/Lake Harriet to Downtown MPLS (Washington Ave. S & 10th St.) – A 20 min drive

The reality: A frustrating 45 min drive with more twists and turns than a M. Night Shyamalan film

So the drive into work starts out with getting to my car only to realize all the windows are frosted over. The first sign of what us Minnesotans get to look forward to for the next 5-6 months. A minor annoyance, but I get out the trusty old ice scraper and go to town.

Finally, ready to go and just as I’m about to pull out of my parking lot a S-L-O-W Bus first drives by, I pull out, and now I’m stuck behind a really slow Metro Transit Bus. Tick-Tock, buddy! Some of us have to get to work. Oh well, I quickly turn on KQ92 and listen to the Morning Show and after a couple of miles he pulls over to pick people up so I zoom past him.

Later on, I’m driving on Hennepin Ave. when out of NOWHERE a parked car on the side of the road pulls RIGHT OUT IN FRONT OF ME!!! I’m talking imminent doom is going to happen here folks, it was that close!! And all I think about is a little voice inside my head saying, “Is this lady serious?” I immediately slam on the brakes (with both feet) and lay on the horn skidding to a stop mere inches from her driver-side door. She gives me a look like she immediately pulled a dumb move and should have had an extra cup of coffee this morning. So now thinking that my life was going to end, but crisis narrowly averted, I’m back on the road and I’m shaking with anger slash shock. (Honestly, had we hit it would not have been good. Somebody call 911 cause we're taking a trip to the hospital!)

So I'm back on my way, and after every stoplight turning red on purpose on Hennepin Ave. I finally make my way into Downtown Minneapolis. Only for my situation to turn worse.

I’m finally downtown, only about a mile or two more to go. When ‘Johnny Impatient’ and his Lexus cuts me off so he can make it to the stoplight 1 second faster than everyone else. (Well Johnny? Was it worth it?) He then proceeds for the next 4-5 city blocks to weave in and out of my lane cutting people off and making them wish they carried guns to work. Well, I finally get around Captain Fantastic and turn right off of Hennepin Ave. onto Washington Ave. Only a half-mile to go!

What I did not realize is that today is the day they started construction on Washington Ave & 10th St. - Right in front of my building! After sitting in my car for 15 mins (not moving) trying to go 1 block. I decided to meander through the back alleys and other streets to get to my Agency parking lot quicker than the speed of backwards. Only to be blocked by a LRT Train and some really slow pedestrians. I should have faked sick and stayed home today.

Take the bus people, you’ll live longer!

Today's Random Observation

I just went to Arby's got back to work with my food and realized ... I FORGOT THE ARBY'S SAUCE!!! CRAP!!

Like many things in life we don't realize how precious and missed they truly are, until you don't have them. Kinda like Arby's Sauce.

Well, that wraps up this lame post.

A forward thinking government?

An article I just read made me do a double-take, and I was already looking at my computer monitor which made this pretty impressive.

In the land of the Far East, the government of Singapore has decided to be ‘cool’ for once and give back to its people. Singapore’s government over the next 2-3 years will be providing free WiFi access to most of the island. Just think of it! Instead of stealing your next door neighbor’s signal on your laptop, which goes in and out (very frustrating), you are all hooked up with your very own, very ‘legal’, WiFi signal anywhere you go, and it doesn’t cost you a dime. How cool is that?!?

And not only that but Singapore is also providing subsidies on computer purchases for low-income families. So now the poor can join the rest of the free world and download porn … err … surf the net; just like the rest of us. Crazy Carl and Stinky Sam you're day is close at hand!

What made me do a double-take here is I couldn’t believe that a government (any government) could be this forward thinking. Sure Singapore can give a beat down (canning) with the best of them for such minor offenses as graffiti and littering, but come on dude, FREE WIFI ACCESS!! Thus, making them the coolest government ever! Well, kind of.

Here’s the article. Behold the madness!

It's a miracle!!

Well I witnessed a miracle today. A deaf man suddenly was able to hear once again.

I was walking back from lunch outside (in downtown Minneapolis). Now I should first set the situation up, I met up with a good friend for lunch today and lost track of time so I was in a hurry to get back to work. Well I'm trying to speed walk (managing to hit every frigin' red light on the crosswalk. I'm finally getting close to work when all of the sudden a monetary-challenged African American (otherwise known as a 'bum') jumps right out in front of me and sticks a card in my face.

At first I was rather startled, but quickly surveyed Crazy Carl's situation and I looked down at the 3rd grade writing on the card (which looked to be done in orange crayon - just classy) and read the first three words, "I am deaf..." Immediately I knew this man was wanting nothing more than money, but I had no time. I said "Sorry, I'm late!" and stepped to the side and rushed past him. To which he yells out, "SHITHEAD!"

So it's at this point I stop and realize, he wasn't looking at my lips, I didn't make any hand movements to indicate that I didn't have change. This guy isn't deaf! So I turn around and yell, "Hey, you aren't deaf! It's a miracle!!" After that all I got was a heartfelt "screw you" and he kept on walking. So wherever you may be Crazy Carl you now have something better than money or all the gold in the world, the gift to hear!! Embrace the gift that has been bestowed upon you, my stinky brother!!!

Miracles can come true my brothers and sisters. And here is the proof.

BTW - If you somehow find yourself "monetary challenged", as this man did, and choose not to work and be a drain on society. Probably not a good idea to start cursing at the people you are looking to give you their hard earned money out of the goodness of their heart. When you do that, it makes us not want to give you the money, and more want to punch you in the face. Just a suggestion.

Everything is going to be OK.

I was randomly surfing the web today, and couldn't believe what I found.

Anyone remember the failed soda marketed by Coca-Cola in the summer of 1994 called, "OK" Soda? Well I sure do!! I loved the stuff, couldn't get enough of it. And I thought it's advertising was hilariously brilliant. Probably cause I have a pretty sarcastic (and sometimes warped) sense of humor. I even ended up calling the 1-800# a couple of times. Anyways, I had forgotten all about OK soda and its ability to control the minds of the youth in 1994, until the web and its world wide usless amount of knowledge refreshed my memory today. I'm still having flashbacks, and still bummed they discontinued it.

Well if you never got to taste this wonderful carbonated nectar known as OK Soda. Don't feel too left out. As it turns out it was only test marketed in a few areas in 1994, before it was discontinued.

If you ever get ambitious here is one of the so-called recipes for the drink:

1/4 orange soft drink
3/4 semi-flat Coca-Cola
a splash of Dr Pepper

To learn everything you'd ever want to know about OK Soda and way too much more. Just click yourself here.

And just remember...Everything is going to be OK.

Sports Talk

Why must we be mocked as sports fans in Minnesota? Okay as my friends are aware, I’m not a hardcore sports fan by ANY means. In fact, I choose the path of movies over sports any day. However, that recently all changed in the realm of baseball. Minnesota Twins baseball to be exact. You see I recently started working for the MN Twins (in a round about way) and co-currently got involved and supported the team this year. I was going to games, cheering the players on, and for the first time in my life ... memorized the line-up. Again, scary to those that know me.

So what happened this weekend when after a great season, all the struggles, injured players and against all odds the Twins made the playoffs? We lost right away to the Oakland Athletics. Didn't even win one playoff game. A team we had no trouble beating during the regular season, we lost to right away. I can’t help but feel let down and disappointed as a Twins fan. It feels like we really turned this year around and just fizzled at the end.

Oh well, I guess we can look back and enjoy the ride of the season that took place. It was exciting, milestones were set, awards achieved, and we did clinch the Central Division. So that's something at least. I guess we can just enjoy the ride this year and look to 2007.

Better luck next year Twins ...

CAPTION IT!

Bored? Well you must because you're here.

Well two of my friends (Pete, Mikey B) and I started up a new blog called: CAPTION IT! Check it out, one random picture will be posted everyday and then you leave your best headline or "caption" in the comments section. It's actually pretty funny, and it sucks a lot less than this blog ... so that's a nice step in the right direction.

CAPTION IT! Tell you friends and family to visit and start the revolution!

Random Pic

"Bees! Bees! Bees in the car! Bees Everywhere! God, they're huge! They're ripping my flesh off! They're huge, and they're sting crazy! Your firearms are useless against them!" - Tommy Boy

Renaissance Festival

Well this past Saturday the crew and I headed down to a magical land filled with knights, food, and weirdoes known as The Renaissance Festival. I usually try to go every year. Minnesota has one of the biggest Renaissance Festivals in the nation, and if you’ve never been, well, then you are truly missing out … medieval style.

The highlights of the day (for me) always include a number of set things:

First up, the food. Some people say the MN State Fair has the best food, but I say NAY! You have your staples, for food, when you go to the Ren Fest. The first up being ‘Soup in a Bread Bowl’. I highly recommend the Wild Rice Soup. It’s a great way to start off the day, and really warms you up. They used to have a kickin’ Beer Cheese Soup, but they don’t use beer anymore in the soup, and that’s bad. Once, you’ve enjoy that the next tasty concoction one must partake in is: Apple Dumplings w/ Cinnamon Ice Cream. Oh yeah! I don’t really need to explain that one. Just damn tasty! And then lastly for all you beer lovers out there, you can wash it all down with an ice cold glass of Premium Beer. Or, for the non-beer lovers, a King or Queen’s cup of Pop (yes, it’s called ‘pop’ not ‘soda’ I don’t’ care what the signs said.) There’s lots of other delicious tasty treats present, but those are my favorites.

The Second thing I always enjoy when going to the Ren Fest are the weirdoes … err … I mean people in costumes. This is the one fair that a select number of individuals wait ALL YEAR for where they can dress up as whatever they want (outside their home) and it becomes totally acceptable. In fact, it’s encouraged! And people are also rewarded for hassling others. What happens when you dress up a bunch of weirdoes that have been hiding all year waiting for this one shining moment, and then mix them with a bunch of passive aggressive Minnesotans? Well … I can only describe it as entertainment. Oh yes … entertainment! What’s even funnier still, is when people dress up for the fair it’s not just restricted to Medieval attire. In fact, this year I caught an eyeful of a guy dressed as a clown. All I can say is quite frightening! Anyone who says otherwise, I tell you to go watch the movie IT. Yikes!

Lastly, the final highlight of the day is Jousting! Nothing better than seeing two knights trying to kill each other. I don’t know how to best describe it; it’s just … cool.

All in all, another successful Ren Fest completed. A great day was had by all! And then the crew and I ended the day with a BBQ in Mikey B’s Garage. Rednecks everywhere would have been proud! The only thing we were missing was NASCAR. Good times. Good times.

God save the King!

P.S. - Here are the pics. Most of which didn't turn out.

Random Picture

Here's a random picture of my friend's dog named, Vahn. This is when Vahn had his ears cropped and looked like a retarded monkey.

Why the random picture and not original material that will entertain, amuse, and inform? Well because I'm just too busy this week (month) with my new job, booking a trip to Japan, and other random stuff that I'm saving up my interesting stories for a rainy day, or at least when I have more free time.

In the meantime, enjoy the retarded monkey.

Insomnia

Well as I write this it's 3:30AM and I can't sleep. Man I hate that!

It doesn't happen very often; I usually don't have trouble sleeping. However, every once in a while my mind will start racing in the middle of the night after a bad dream or if something is on my mind troubling me (as it is at the moment) and I wake up in the middle of the night and can't get back to sleep till about 5AM, but by then it's time to wake my ass up for work again in about an hour.

Damn you brain and all your thoughts! I should stab you with a Q-tip!

Random Picture Day

Today's random picture is brought to us from the movie Anchorman.

If you haven't seen it you're either retarded, or living in a cave somewhere ... like this man. CANNONBALL!!!!

Hot Lake Action - Part Deux

Well I've said it once and I'll say it again. There is just nothing better than spending a day on the lake in summertime. Truly one of the greatest, most relaxing moments you can experience. In my opinion, anyways.

Of course, you throw in a little first time water-skiing and crazy 'hang-on for dear life' tubing (where the driver is trying to dump you into the lake) and it doesn't really become relaxing anymore as you're flung clear across the lake at high speeds and pray that your death will be swift and painless. But hey, it's still fun!

Kudos and props to you Cory for letting us use your lake hook-ups. You're the man!

Well I enjoyed yet another action-packed weekend on the lake and here's a conglomeration of the lake pics. Including me trying water-skiing for the first time. I guess the thing is I did it. I was only up on the skis for about 10-15 seconds (twice), but at least I did it. So there!

Click here for all the pics. In no particular order.

BTW - Some volleyball pics in there too. Hey, what better way to end the day than with some volleyball. Hey, comrades?

I can't smile anymore

Well I started my new job today. And man was the whole day a blur.

I started off the morning filling out lots of documents in HR of which I'm sure I probably signed a kidney away, or my first unborn child or something to that effect.

After that, it was off to take a tour of the new place. I was literally brought around to each individual person and introduced. Just about 150 people in all. Not only did this make it impossible to remember any names, but the tour was done in such a random way that I can't tell where the hell I'm going in this building. Later in the day, I walked into a wall a couple of times thinking it had a magic portal or a secret door or something...but it didn't. :(

Also, halfway through the tour I was fake smiling and laughing so much, meeting all the new people, I think my face broke. Seriously, I can't smile anymore...it hurts.

However, the day wasn't all bad. The new team took me out to a tasty lunch. And I got a nice office, a new mac and free parking downtown Minneapolis. Which is HUGE if you work downtown. And I get to work on the MN Twins with some great people. So it's not all bad.

Senor Frog

I was out at the parents' house this weekend for my sister's B-Day. Happy B-Day Angela! 21 years old for the fifth straight year. Simply amazing!

Anyway, as I'm leaving I see what originally thought was a green leaf stuck to the side of the house. Upon closer inspection, it was a small green frog just blending into its surroundings by a giant green bush.

Thought it was pretty neato-keen looking so I snapped some pics. Enjoy!

Hangin' Out

Trying to sleep, but some stupid human keeps using the flash.

Showin' some leg.

Pissed off.

Well after about 30 annoying pictures I finally left Senor Frog alone to take a nap in the bushes. Good night little buddy.

Gimp the Cat

Today's random pic is to give props to my friend's cat simply named, 'Gimp'. She is arguably the coolest and weirdest cat in existence today.

You stay classy, Milwaukee!

What could be better than a weekend with the guys, drinking beer, a road trip and a baseball game thrown in to top it all off? Well maybe that weekend with some hot girls, but other then that … nothing.

So last weekend Eric, Kris, Mike, and myself packed it up for a guy’s road-trip to Milwaukee or as Mike tells us … ‘"mill-e-wah-que" which is Algonquin for "the good land."’

In this glorious city, among cities, much beer was consumed, practical jokes played, Eric flashing anyone that would watch and of course America’s greatest pastime … Baseball.

Here are a few of the trip’s highlights:

Think it's a good idea to eat a chili-cheese hot dog from a gas station? Think again, it might just be a decision you regret later. Right, Mike?

One of the main food attractions in Millwaukee is a place called Kopps. (Very similar to Culvers). However, if you ever go there please notice that they make JUMBO burgers. A fact I did not realize when I ordered my "double cheesburger." I'm still full.

Ahh, the Miller Brewery Tour. Gotta say I'm not a big fan of beer, but it was impressive. Eric, Kris, and especially Mike just about had a heart attack when they saw all the beer at this place. The security guards later caught Eric trying to jump into a huge vat of beer and swim around naked in it.

This warehouse contains over 500,000 cases of beer. You could fit 5 football fields in here. And the amazing thing is all this beer will be emptied and refilled within 24 hours. Damn, that's a lot of drunk people!

Say hello to everyone back home. Thanks Kris.

Time for some tailgating action! Before the Milwaukee Brewers game we decided to join the huge tailgating party and let me tell you these people know how to do it right! Man, I wish we could do this for MN Twins' games.

Time for the game. Miller Park Stadium. This stadium is just simply amazing!

Here's a panoramic picture of the stadium I tried to take. Click on the image or go to my photos for a better picture. Just amazing seats no matter where you are at; it makes you feel like you are right there within spitting distance from the players.

My ticket.

Weiner Races. Polish Sausage (left) won by a lot.

On the way home, I discovered a Rocky Rococo Pizza place and had to stop. As far as restaurants go, pretty crappy interior, but just GREAT pizza in my opinion. I was soooo excited to discover this gem of a find on the way home. Flashbacks of my childhood ensued. These are all but extinct now in Minnesota, but they still live on in Wisconsin (land of yester-year). And they serve "Spotted Cow" beer so the guys were happy.

Lastly, here is photo documented proof of the worst McDonalds EVER. A bunch of Re-Re's are running this place. The kid that served me was either Iclandic or Retarded. He took my order (which he really had trouble with) then made me stand there for 10 mins (literally) as he starred off into space doing nothing. I could go on, but it's a frustrating story filled with anger and empty calories and not worth it. Morale of the story, I'm finally sick of McDonalds.

However, over all just a great trip and a really fun weekend escape with the guys. I'm thinking we need to do this again next year! If you want to check out all the photos click yourself on over to my photobucket here (FYI - Pics are in totally random order).

You stay classy, Millwuakee!

Thanks for the memories...

Well today marked my last day at my current job. After 3 years and 3 months I'm leaving one Ad agency for another (which I start working at in about a week).

Leaving a job is always an interesting experience, here are a few highlights of what I've found to be true:

- Cleaning your office for the last time is a therapeutic experience. All the "important" files and information I was forced to hold onto for 3 years, I got to throw. I threw everything! Subsequently, I found all the files, and things I've been looking for for the past 3 years, after I cleaned my office...for the last time.

- People are so much friendlier and better to work with your last few days at work.

- You get happier as your workload disappears.

- You are sad to leave the friends you've made.

- Every goodbye you say and do always ends with an awkward pause at the end, no matter how you approach it. After the awkward pause it always ends with someone saying, "Well, thanks again..." and then depart. Hug is optional.

- This is the only time at a job you hope and pray you didn't take any vacation time, because you get your phat vacation check for all the time you didn't take. Oh yeah!!

- Also, taking a week off between jobs is one of the only times you can truly feel free and totally unhindered with no responsibilities. Kinda like summer vacation in High School.

Well, good times were had old agency. And I'm off for a weekend trip to a Brewers game in Milwaukee with the guys and then a week off with nothing to do. It's going to be amazing!

To quote Office Space, “I did nothing. I did nothing and it was everything I thought it could be.” That will be my week off.

Hot Lake Action

Well this weekend my friend Cory had a lake party on Prior Lake and damn was it fun! We all spent most the day on his boat, which consisted of many activities such as being pulled on a two person inner tube behind a speed boat while he thought it was funny to drive at insane speeds and whip shitties as I'm hanging on for dear life. I gotta say it was a blast!

And when that was done, and for the record, I went water-skiing for the first time in my life. Not everybody that tried that day could get up and stay up on the skis, but I did! Oh yeah, I totally conquered those ski's, the lake and the boat pulling me. No doubt! I was up for about a good ... oh, I'd say ... ten seconds. That's right, I'm all that is man!

Afterwards. we all ended the day with a BBQ, backyard volleyball (I have a wicked serve), watching Matt and Katie's cute baby girl, and a bonfire. Summer days and nights don't get much better then this. Good times were had by all.

Kudos on the rockin' party, Cory. Kudos!

Pics to come...

Babies in the Office

Babies + Office = Awkward. A formula for forced smiles and shifty eyes.

A former co-worker of mine brought their newborn baby into the office today and showed off the little guy for all to see. Now don't get the wrong impression, I like babies and all. They're cute and cuddly and truly we can all agree the miracle of life is wondrous, right? I mean we all saw that video in school so it has to be true! Anyways, I'm getting sidetracked....

Someone showing off their newborn baby in the office always seems to be this really awkward forced interaction everytime I see and experience it. Truly one of those "Office Space" moments.

Here's what I usually see happen. Enter the proud mother with newborn baby in tow (either in arms or stroller). She walks the little one around to each separate person and "surprises" them (usually by standing one foot behind the person in their cube while that person is engaged in the middle of a work call or email) and before you can realize what is going on you are scared half to death all while trying to figure out why the heck you are staring at a baby?

Then the mother is looking to you to re-assure her that her child is the cutest kid on the planet. So instinctively you go to non-stop smile and goo-goo talk mode, but you can only do that for so long before it starts to get awkward and creepy. Which leads me back to my original point.

Babies + Office = Awkward. New mothers be warned, congratulations on the kid! We want to see him or her, but please no ninja stealth moves around the office shoving babies in my face. It tends to creep me out!

A fast electric car?

I stumbled upon perhaps the biggest breakthrough in the fight against global warming. A sexy, FAST 'Electric' sports car. Usually the words 'fast', 'electric car' and 'cool' are not three words you imagine going together in the same sentence. (I guess that's 4 words, eh.)

However, Telsa Motors has come up with an Electric Sports car (Tesla Roadster) which is powered by a 3-phase, 4-pole AC induction motor and can go 130 mph and does 0-60 in about 4 seconds, all while totally silent. This car is so green and electric it doesn't even have a tailpipe! A bad-ass totally silent high-preformance sports car with zero emissions. Even will go 250 miles on a single charge.

However, don't get your hopes up quite yet for scoring one of these babies. They don't hit the streets till 2007 and will run you in about the $80,000 to $120,000 price range. OUCH!

Go visit AutoBlogGreen.com for the full article, along with some sweet pics and video of the unveiling in California.

BTW - For those looking for all the creature comforts that a combustible engine car provides, yes it comes with everything a regular car does: AC, High-end stereo, Satellite Radio, Power/Heated seats, blah blah blah...

Hey, it's even endorsed by the Governor of Kal-e-Forn-IA....Arnie himself.

Linky time:

Who Killed the Electric Car? - Website for the documentary/film. Check out the trailer, some interesting facts, and your local showtimes. Good flick!

The Zombie Survival Guide

The title says it all doesn't it? Well in one of my random searches of the internet I came upon something that I first thought was a joke and starting laughing hysterically, then when I realized it wasn't a joke I ... started laughing even more. After about 3 hours of staring at the cover in disbelief I came to realize that this was an actual book and I started reading it.

In case you've ever been attacked by those pesky creatures of the undead and wish there was a tutorial for avoiding, destroying and just learning more about our enemy "the zombie." Well, my friend, then look no further!

This book entitled The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks is the ultimate and last source you will ever need to arm yourself with knowledge against the undead. It covers topics of zombie characteristics and detection, weapon detail (at length), defending yourself, escape techniques, terrain, historical accounts and believe me the list goes on. However the topics you WON'T find in this book are: the basement (a guide to living off your parents), Advanced D&D techniques for 7th level masters, how to avoid girls, hallucinogenic drugs, and how people confuse movies with real life.

Seriously, how there was enough material for this 270 page book, or enough money for publishing is beyond me!

Apparently, Zombies are among us my friends. Arm yourselves with knowledge, before it's too late! B-R-A-I-N-S!!!!!!

Funny Pic

Here's a pic I just had to share. Funny stuff! Props to my friend Pete who posted the link where I found this pic.

More LA ...

Well I'm not feeling particularly creative at the moment so here are some more (random) pics I took in LA.

(Sorry, next time I'll try to have something hopefully somewhat entertaining for you to read. In the meantime, enjoy the random pics.)

My hotel in Santa Monica.

I requested a single room, and I got 2 Queen beds. Huh?

Remember that craptastic 90's TV show Melrose Place? (Yeah, me neither.) Here's the street that started it all.

Just chillin'

Artistic Attempt 1

Artist Attempt 2

Creepy & Cool

Death Chasing a Flock of Mortals - 1896

Random Bust

These next two pics I shot off the Santa Monica Pier right next to the Pacific Ocean where there was a memorial/funeral set-up to honor our fallen in combat. Very humbling.

Remembering our Troops - Santa Monica Beach

Honoring the Fallen - Santa Monica Beach